Sup, guys?
Sorry, I can't call you That word today. I'm in class. Yeah, I'm badass. I write blog posts in class, like all the cool kids. I don't pay attention. Actually, I'm not at all. I'm writing a blogpost because I'm so un-badass that i finished my assignment early. So I am wasting your time. I wanted to put a picture of Dick, the species confused goose, in this, but I can't because I am not on my computer. This isn't funny.
Apples.
That was funny.
So, this blog post is just so i can lower your standards, so when I make a post next, it will look better by comparison. I learned this technique from hyperbole and a half. Allie is cool. Check out her blog, I can't be bothered to link it.
I like trains.
Until the next *Insert word here* post,
~~Laura
Wednesday 28 March 2012
Monday 12 March 2012
FAT
Sup, Bitches?
So, me and my sister ( http://brok3n-statues.tumblr.com/ ) were on a walk tonight, talking about high school bitches who beg to know your crush. Then they try to tell you who you do have a crush on. "You totally like Bert, don't deny it") And no matter how much you try and convince them you don't like that person, they won't let it go. If you deny it, it's your crush. If you don't deny it, it's your crush. There is no winning. Anyway, whilst talking about this, Emily (my sister), tried to give an example.
*Text in italics are her acting as the other person, being told who they like.
Emily: You totally like that tree. No I don't, we're just friends! You so like that tree.
Me: Poor tree.
Emily: It just got FRIEND-ZONED.
Me: Forever alone.
Which resulted in me going home and drawing this picture.
I didn't DRAW it draw it, I went on paint, inserted a bunch of pictures, and put Dick, the species confused goose down the bottom because I thought it would be a funny addition.
It's funny too, because if you anagram Forever Alone Tree it says FAT. I figured that out when I saved the image as FAT.jpg.
That was a spur of the moment change of subject, because I didn't know what to say about the tree.
Sweet.
So, me and my sister ( http://brok3n-statues.tumblr.com/ ) were on a walk tonight, talking about high school bitches who beg to know your crush. Then they try to tell you who you do have a crush on. "You totally like Bert, don't deny it") And no matter how much you try and convince them you don't like that person, they won't let it go. If you deny it, it's your crush. If you don't deny it, it's your crush. There is no winning. Anyway, whilst talking about this, Emily (my sister), tried to give an example.
*Text in italics are her acting as the other person, being told who they like.
Emily: You totally like that tree. No I don't, we're just friends! You so like that tree.
Me: Poor tree.
Emily: It just got FRIEND-ZONED.
Me: Forever alone.
Which resulted in me going home and drawing this picture.
I didn't DRAW it draw it, I went on paint, inserted a bunch of pictures, and put Dick, the species confused goose down the bottom because I thought it would be a funny addition.
It's funny too, because if you anagram Forever Alone Tree it says FAT. I figured that out when I saved the image as FAT.jpg.
That was a spur of the moment change of subject, because I didn't know what to say about the tree.
Sweet.
Wednesday 7 March 2012
Geese, and Why You Shouldn't Draw Them Front-On
Sup, Bitches?
So I have decided that the last post was not appropriately climatic and not at all jizz-worthy, so I decided to cover it up with a picture of a goose that I accidentally made look slightly penis-like, and it was totally unintentional. You should never draw a goose front on. It will almost definitely turn into a penis. A penis with eyes. And wings.
Also, the goose's eyes are red and grey because we all know geese a fucking scary and were created by demons to kill us all.
And for all of you who are pissed of with me for posting this totally unrelated goose, look at the title. Now back to this post. Just kidding, you're a butt.
Now, this picture almost definitely made you jizz in your pants, because penises with eyes and wings turn everyone on. This blog is already getting awkward and we only made it yesterday. Also, I keep forgetting to let Daniel know what I'm posting or when I'm posting it, so it appears that I am hogging the blog.
Until the next jizz-worthy post,
~~Laura
So I have decided that the last post was not appropriately climatic and not at all jizz-worthy, so I decided to cover it up with a picture of a goose that I accidentally made look slightly penis-like, and it was totally unintentional. You should never draw a goose front on. It will almost definitely turn into a penis. A penis with eyes. And wings.
Also, the goose's eyes are red and grey because we all know geese a fucking scary and were created by demons to kill us all.
And for all of you who are pissed of with me for posting this totally unrelated goose, look at the title. Now back to this post. Just kidding, you're a butt.
Now, this picture almost definitely made you jizz in your pants, because penises with eyes and wings turn everyone on. This blog is already getting awkward and we only made it yesterday. Also, I keep forgetting to let Daniel know what I'm posting or when I'm posting it, so it appears that I am hogging the blog.
Until the next jizz-worthy post,
~~Laura
You Guys Probably Have Better Taste Than Us, or You Could Be the Bitches I Greet You As
Sup, Bitches?
This is my new greeting, I like the feel of it.So, our first post got us a lot more page views then we expected. (Yes, we didn't expect 26 page views)
We have decided this will probably work, as long as we keep up some jizz-worthy posts, which we can't do without our 26 viewers input, 76% of which may have accidentally clicked. (Percentages may or may not be accurate.)
So we were wondering what types of posts people like you that live on the internet prefer. I live on the internet too, so I will not let your ideas be a certainty, or ruin mine and Daniel's thoughts on what this blog should be. However, we will take your ideas into consideration.
Until another jizz-worthy post shows itself, farewell.
~~Laura
Monday 5 March 2012
Sup, bitches?
So, me and Daniel were just chilling around drinking apple juice and eating garlic bread, like everyone does early on a Tuesday afternoon, and decided to make a blog. Don't get excited. This won't be intellectual on any standard, except that we can spell, unlike most other bloggers on here :)
Our posts will not be scheduled in any way, but the posts that appear will be exciting, and may very well make you jizz in your pants. (Don't get your hopes up, this was a mild exaggeration.)
So, until we post a jizz-worthy blog post, farewell.
~~Laura
So, me and Daniel were just chilling around drinking apple juice and eating garlic bread, like everyone does early on a Tuesday afternoon, and decided to make a blog. Don't get excited. This won't be intellectual on any standard, except that we can spell, unlike most other bloggers on here :)
Our posts will not be scheduled in any way, but the posts that appear will be exciting, and may very well make you jizz in your pants. (Don't get your hopes up, this was a mild exaggeration.)
So, until we post a jizz-worthy blog post, farewell.
~~Laura
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